Finding Love - A Jacked Relationship

I knew my whole life what my plan for love looked like. I had it all laid out, married by mid-20’s, kids before 30, upgrade to my next house by 35… the plan went on and on. The only thing I hadn’t planned for was all the actual work it would take for a happy and healthy relationship. I had no idea what “forever” really meant and how lonely it could be in the wrong relationship.

I loved rom-com’s, and believed my life would be just like one of those movies, a fairytale of sorts. I thought I was on track. I got married at 26 years old, the first time… by 27 I was completely miserable and alone even though I was married. The dream was starting to implode. By 29 I realized I needed to start over if I was going to have time to do it all again. That’s when it got really complicated.

Dating in my early 30’s was BRUTAL. I couldn’t understand the games, mentally and emotionally. I had the lowest possible conversion rate on relationships. After about 4 years, I literally gave up and decided perhaps I was meant to be perpetually single. My childhood vision was so far gone.

I did fall hard during these years for 2 different men. Each came with more heartache than I could have ever imagined possible, and neither gave back what I was giving them. I ached so badly for what I thought was love, my heart broke over and over as I clung to mere threads of what I wanted to be real relationships. I took to blogging anonymously, a place to work out my thoughts out loud because I started to believe that maybe I was going crazy. Something had to be wrong with me. Turned out, there was a great big audience around the world going through the same things I was.

I eventually wrote a book. It was in reliving my experiences that I actually finally learned so many of the lessons. I began to understand and see who I was being in relationships, and it wasn’t even close to who I actually was or wanted to be. I had lost all sense of my boundaries, and had no idea what I even wanted any more. I started to think I was deserving of the crap I was putting up with because it seemed no one was giving me what I really wanted. I had started living down to others’ standard for fear that no one would step up to mine.

I finally threw in the towel. I was enjoying writing about relationships, and the great big network of single women I had created at the time. Then it happened… a man came into my life. I was in a very different place. I had a blossoming career, was travelling extensively for work, I loved my blogging community and single friend network. I had started to believe I had it all. And during that time, my worth had grown. I knew what I wanted, and I finally decided I wasn’t giving it up for anyone. I worked through my own process of getting clear on exactly what I wanted, what I deserved and what my deal-breakers were.

On our very first date, I broke every single rule you will ever hear about how to “win the guy/girl.” I laid out my wish list so emphatically that when I left dinner that evening, I legitimately called my mom (who I tell everything to and was waiting to hear about my date) and said “I doubt I will ever hear from that guy again.” I could hear the panic in her voice, “oh no, what did you do?” Before she even got her sentence out, I heard my phone ding – he texted me. It wasn’t 10 minutes since we’d said goodbye. 

I married that man. From the very first date, he not only stood to meet my standards, he worked to raise the bar. Five years later, he still does. I knew exactly what I wanted and had finally decided I wouldn’t compromise. It showed up. When it did, it actually took me some time to decide if I was willing to make room in the life I had finally embraced for someone. I did.

Relationships are my passion. Helping individuals get clear on what they want, build or re-establish self-esteem, and figure out what they need to do in order to have a healthy, happy and balanced relationship has never been more important to me. 

Whether you are in a relationship and need a little boost, or looking for one and want to make sure you get what you need – let’s get working on A Jacked Relationship.

A Jacked Relationship - Coaching Package

3 one on one coaching sessions (1-1.5 hours each)

Get Clarity, Build Confidence, Be Loved

Special Offer @ $399 CAD.

Click here to book.