The Solution To One of My Challenges Is Simple, But I Don't Want to Do It

We were frantically tidying up before company was due to visit the cottage, hiding away our day to day clutter when I watched my husband place my laptop on a shelf in the closet.  “You can’t put it there!!!” I yelled. He was shocked at the energy of my reaction. I collected my thoughts quickly, feeling bad for having been so abrupt – and explained “If you put it there, I will forget it when I pack up to go home.”

I know myself well. No matter who tells me I’m not going to forget something, I do. On a recent vacation, he suggested I hang two newly purchased perfectly steamed blouses in the hotel wardrobe, assuring me I wouldn’t forget them when we left the next day. Half way home from Charleston, SC the hotel called…international priority shipping was almost as much as replacing one blouse!!

I admittedly have a terrible memory. It’s been a weakness of mine for a very long time. Truth be told there isn’t anything wrong with my memory, but rather I have a busy mind and pride myself on multitasking ALL the time. I spend my waking moments processing thoughts and ideas at about a 1000 miles an hour and using every spare moment to knock something off my list.

The obvious solution is simple - “SLOW DOWN” and do one thing at a time. Being quick and busy is the part of myself I leverage often to accomplish a LOT of things in life.  If there’s a minute waiting for something, I fill it with something else. So, yes, I could slow down. But, I don’t want to! I’ve got a great big list of to do’s in life and let’s face it, the clock never stops!

We all know that ‘someone’ who seems to bump up against the same problems that we as outsiders see the simple solutions for, maybe you’re one of them to?

Focusing on Improving A Weakness Isn’t Always The Best Fix

 The weakness isn’t necessarily the problem. Awareness is. Once we know what our strengths and weaknesses are, we can create systems and structures to support ourselves. 

I remember hearing the example many years ago, but continue to use it to this day to remind myself:

If I gave you 3 weeks to learn to write your signature with your non-dominant hand, could you learn to write it as well as with your dominant hand?

The reality is, it’s highly unlikely you could replace YEARS of experience in a matter of 3 weeks.

So why as Leaders, Parents & People do we spend so much of our time focused on improving the weaknesses of others instead of enhancing and bringing forth strengths? Our strengths can be grown exponentially with investment, while our weaknesses may only be improved at best. Where do you put your focus? 

Creating Structures and Support

What options are left then? Finding ways that work. There is almost always a balance between the things we are good at, and not so good at. While my memory and focus are lackluster, I am meticulously organized, consistent and a great planner.

Awareness of both my strengths and weaknesses over the years have enabled me to put structures and systems in place to support what makes me really productive (quick moving/busy minded) and what challenges me (forgetful/distracted). There is a reason companies put SOP’s (Standard Operating Procedures) in place. 

Some of my structures include: 

·      Shorter Calendar Reminders – 5 min not 15 min before – I used to get click snooze on the reminders and then get caught up again in the middle of something else on my to do list while I waited… 

·      Consistency in Placement of Things – everything has its place, I never have to argue over who’s cell phone charger is where because I only put mine in the same places.

·      Routine – I build time into my day to allow consistency in how I do repeat things while limiting stress & forgetfulness – this includes my morning routine before CrossFit every day, how I prepare for client meetings, mental space to prepare and plan for the day or week ahead.

·      Lists  - I have many, it serves two purposes – 1) checking things off feels good and keeps me motivated, 2) ensure I don’t forget things I need to do or get.  Unlike my husband I forget what I went into the Grocery store for the minute I walk in the door. I use a real time App that we both share on our phones and update instantly the minute I run out of anything.

·      Alarms – I use my Watch to remind me of timing for things like blocking my spot in a CrossFit Class to remembering to check the food on the BBQ (while I am busy trying to multitask!)

We can’t change everything about ourselves, but we can learn to embrace and work with all parts of who we are.

What challenge do you come up against repeatedly that if solved for would reduce your stress or overwhelm? What structures are in place or could be put in place to save you the headache? What strengths can you leverage to solve for your weaknesses?

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